DAMMIT.

This will not be a conciliatory post congratulating the Tossers for winning the belt. Oh no.

This is a list of hatred.

• Torrey Smith, you talentless lump, you can eat a bag of dried assholes. Zero points? Really?

• Eli Manning, who dropped five touchdowns in a meaningless game while smugly sitting on my bench, can suck an entire dick.

• Tom Brady, would it have killed you to score another garbage touchdown against Miami? And after I went to all that trouble defending you? We're breaking up. Find yourself another fantasy team next year.

• Even though I dropped Chris Johnson midway through the season, I'll go ahead and assign some blame to him, too. What the hell. DIE ALREADY.

• Blame goes to all the players on my team who spent time on IR, such as Mike Wallace and DeMarco Murray, but the list is really to many to count. At times my roster resembled more of a MASH unit than a fantasy football team.

• Lastly, I blame you. Yes, you. I hate all of you.